It's been just over 12 months since I posted my last blog and wow, what a difference a year makes. The last time you visited my blog you read all about my struggle to deal with being sick. I won't lie, it was a pretty tough time, and I think I can say that I've had the toughest year of my life. But perseverence and belief has brought me out the darkness and I can honestly say that right now I'm the happiest I've been in a long, long time.
A year ago I sat watching the opening ceremony of the London 2012 Olympics not knowing what the year ahead would bring. But it seemed that the feel good factor from the success of our British Olympians and Paralympians triggered something in me. Or maybe it was just a coincidence that the drugs kicked in at the same time!
As I started to feel stronger, I seemed to gain a new confidence in myself too. I've always felt a little inferior to those around me. Inferior maybe because of the condition I have, that it somehow made me less of a person. But this new confidence taught me to be happy with who I am. We all know people who pretend to be someone or something they're not. Always wanting what someone else has, or living beyond their means to keep up with the Jones'. But until you learn to just be yourself and live your own life, without worrying about what other people think of you, you'll never be happy.
Happiness really does start with loving and accepting yourself... flaws and all. My Diabetes is part of my life and makes me who I am, and for once I'm very happy to be that person. I have different job to 12 months ago, and although stressful, I really enjoy it. I work with some great people who make me laugh til my sides hurt every single day. Never underestimate the power of laughter because when it's not there, life becomes a dark, lonely place.
I also spent most of last summer talking to JB, my friend's baby bump, telling him how I couldn't wait to hold him and be the mad auntie his mum warned him to stay away from. And now he's here, a bundle of pure joy bringing love and smiles to everyone around him, including me.
Then there's the friendships to talk about, both old and new. There's friends I've not seen for almost 20 years that have walked back into my life and the friendship feels as natural and unforced as it did all those years ago. There's also new friends that have welcomed me into their lives making me feel like I belong, like I'm one of them, not inferior, just Katie.
I think one of my proudest achievements of the past year is that I was given the go ahead to be able to exercise, so I started running. I couldn't run 2 miles 2 months ago and now I'm running 5 miles three times a week. For most people running just involves sticking on a pair of trainers and hitting the pavements. But it's not that easy when you have Diabetes. Sugar levels must be at a safe starting level, low GI Carbs must be eaten an hour before heading out taken with 25% of the normal dose of insulin. Sugar levels must be tested immediately after a run and a high GI carb must be eaten straight away. Reduced insulin needs to be taken for the following 12 hours and blood sugar monitoring is vital to avoid hypoglycaemia. But it's all worth it for the sense of achievement I felt when I hit that first ever 5 mile run.
One thing that hasn't changed is my marital status. Yes I'm still single but now I realise that being in a relationship is not the route to happiness, it would merely enhance the happy life that I'm already living.
So I guess to sum up this year I'd say it's been pretty darn good. Here's to 2014... long may the health and happiness continue.
K x
Sunday, December 1, 2013
Thursday, July 26, 2012
And breathe......
Right now, at this present moment I feel pure relief. Relief that I'm not a hypochondriac. Relief that I've not been overreacting. Relief that eventually I can get myself back on the road to recovery.
I've been waiting on a phone call from the consultant to let me know what my blood tests showed. The blood tests that I had taken earlier today."We have your results Miss Duffy and they do show that your thyroid is underactive. But it's not just underactive, it's dramatically underactive. They show extremely low T4 (thyroxine) levels, levels in fact that we wouldn't normally expect to see. It's no surprise at all that you've been feeling the way you have."
If I had the energy I'd do a little dance round the living room. I knew I was ill, I knew this wasn't just me making it up. But the doubts did cross my mind. I'd heard people say they had an underactive thyroid and never had any problems. So was all of this in my imagination? Was I losing it? Luckily it turns out I wasn't. And so now I can start taking the tablets that will hopefully get me back on the mend and back to feeling remotely human again. But it's more than that. The sooner I'm back on my feet, the sooner I can start looking at my blood sugar levels and my diabetes.
I mentioned in a previous post that the thyroid affects the way the human body uses insulin. Prior to having thyroid issues I was taking twice as much insulin as I am now. So although I can breathe a massive sigh of relief that my thyroxine levels could soon be under control, I need to prepare myself for the stress that comes with erractic blood sugar levels. But this is the way it has to be for the short term future. There's no quick fix. As the two illnesses have a direct effect on each other, it's impossible to treat them both at the same time. One needs to be fixed before the other can even be looked at. But it's cool. I knew this and now I feel like maybe I've turned a corner.
Some of you may be a little bit bored hearing me moan on about being sick. You may be sat there thinking I should take a look around me and see that there are so many people worse off. And you know what? You're right. I have sat watching those incredibly brave people running with the Olympic torch, each with their own story. Some have been to war, fought for MY country, and have come back missing limbs, vision, hearing, and colleagues. And yet they're out there running to show that regardless of what they've been through, they will not be beaten.
So I do take a look at myself. I have a job, I have a roof over my head, I have amazing science keeping me alive every day, and most importantly I have friends and family that love me. And I am incredibly grateful and humbled for that. I always try to remember that there are people worse off than me, it's something that my mum taught me from a very early age. But I saw something on tv this morning that will stick wth me for a very long time. Katie Piper was being interviewed. For those of you that don't know, Katie was a beautiful young lady that had acid maliciously thrown in her face a few years back. She has been through many, many a painful operation, and has had to live with the awful consequences of what happened. What she's been through is just impossible to comprehend. But after being asked a question she replied by saying that no one person's problems are more important than someone else's. If you're struggling to cope with something, and it's dramatically affecting you going about your daily activities, then it's a problem, regardless of what it is.
So I won't feel guilty about what I'm going through. However I will appreciate the life that I have been given, and hope and pray that maybe one day I can show the strength and courage that those less fortunate than me show.
K x
I've been waiting on a phone call from the consultant to let me know what my blood tests showed. The blood tests that I had taken earlier today."We have your results Miss Duffy and they do show that your thyroid is underactive. But it's not just underactive, it's dramatically underactive. They show extremely low T4 (thyroxine) levels, levels in fact that we wouldn't normally expect to see. It's no surprise at all that you've been feeling the way you have."
If I had the energy I'd do a little dance round the living room. I knew I was ill, I knew this wasn't just me making it up. But the doubts did cross my mind. I'd heard people say they had an underactive thyroid and never had any problems. So was all of this in my imagination? Was I losing it? Luckily it turns out I wasn't. And so now I can start taking the tablets that will hopefully get me back on the mend and back to feeling remotely human again. But it's more than that. The sooner I'm back on my feet, the sooner I can start looking at my blood sugar levels and my diabetes.
I mentioned in a previous post that the thyroid affects the way the human body uses insulin. Prior to having thyroid issues I was taking twice as much insulin as I am now. So although I can breathe a massive sigh of relief that my thyroxine levels could soon be under control, I need to prepare myself for the stress that comes with erractic blood sugar levels. But this is the way it has to be for the short term future. There's no quick fix. As the two illnesses have a direct effect on each other, it's impossible to treat them both at the same time. One needs to be fixed before the other can even be looked at. But it's cool. I knew this and now I feel like maybe I've turned a corner.
Some of you may be a little bit bored hearing me moan on about being sick. You may be sat there thinking I should take a look around me and see that there are so many people worse off. And you know what? You're right. I have sat watching those incredibly brave people running with the Olympic torch, each with their own story. Some have been to war, fought for MY country, and have come back missing limbs, vision, hearing, and colleagues. And yet they're out there running to show that regardless of what they've been through, they will not be beaten.
So I do take a look at myself. I have a job, I have a roof over my head, I have amazing science keeping me alive every day, and most importantly I have friends and family that love me. And I am incredibly grateful and humbled for that. I always try to remember that there are people worse off than me, it's something that my mum taught me from a very early age. But I saw something on tv this morning that will stick wth me for a very long time. Katie Piper was being interviewed. For those of you that don't know, Katie was a beautiful young lady that had acid maliciously thrown in her face a few years back. She has been through many, many a painful operation, and has had to live with the awful consequences of what happened. What she's been through is just impossible to comprehend. But after being asked a question she replied by saying that no one person's problems are more important than someone else's. If you're struggling to cope with something, and it's dramatically affecting you going about your daily activities, then it's a problem, regardless of what it is.
So I won't feel guilty about what I'm going through. However I will appreciate the life that I have been given, and hope and pray that maybe one day I can show the strength and courage that those less fortunate than me show.
K x
Monday, July 23, 2012
One of those days
Sometimes, only your mates can tell it like it is... "you look like you've been smacked in the face in the Bigg Market but without the bruises." And you know what? My mate is right. I look a mess. My face is so swollen I can barely open my eyes. It's just something else to add to the ever growing list of things that seem to be going wrong with my health. Only this time it's not related to my Diabetes, I believe it's my thyroid that's causing the problems.
I found out in January 2012 I had an overactive thyroid. More specifically I had what was called Graves Disease. Not the best name for an illness, granted, but it was named after the man who founded it, rather than it's prognosis (thank God). I'd been suffering with what I thought were hypo symptoms for a few weeks - hot flushes, palpitations, hand tremors, as well as an anxious feeling and weight loss. A routine blood pressure check with the practice nurse showed an increased heartbeat. I mentioned my pulse had been high at my last Diabetes appointment and after a short chat she suggested I have a blood test to check my thyroid. Sure enough, the tests came back showing it was overactive - basically it was producing too much of the hormone thyroxine which was why I'd been having all the symptoms I've just mentioned.
What I learned in the next couple of days about the the thyroid is quite remarkable. Now I am no doctor so my explanations are in simple terms for all to understand. It's a small butterfly shaped gland that sits neatly in your neck and produces hormones, one of them being thyroxine, and it does so much you wouldn't actually believe it. It's responsible for everything from regulating your heartrate to the way your hair and nails grow. If you produce too much thyroxine then things in your body speed up - metabolism, heartrate, appetite etc - and this is what had happened to me. The diagnosis of Grave's Disease came about as I am a text book case - a woman in her thirties with an underlying auto immune illness. Normally the symptoms can be treated with beta blockers which will take away the tremours and fluttering heart, but as those symptoms are also the symptoms of a hypo, it was decided that it would be too dangerous for me to take them. If I went hypo during the night and had no symptoms then I might not wake up. So my course of medication was a tablet to stop the thyroid from producing thyroxine altogether, and eventually take it into an underactive state, in order for me to have a type of treatment called Radioiodine.
Now this treatment isn't as bad as it may sound, infact it's been around for quite a number of years. This treatment stops the thyroid from producing too much thyroxine and involves taking a small pill containing radioactive iodine.... and, well that's it! You're radioactive for around two weeks, so there's to be no contact with babies, or pregnant women, and no sharing a bed with a partner. There are a few other things to avoid but they are minor. After the two weeks, normal service can be resumed. As for the side effects, well this is why I am sat here now writing this.
At first I felt nothing, maybe just a dry throat. But the purpose of the radioiodine is to ultimately take the thyroid into an underactive state so that a tablet can be taken every day for life, to replace the missing hormone. I am now in that underactive state and struggling. I'm not yet taking that tablet to replace the missing thyroxine so everyday tasks have become mammoth. I mentioned earier that the thyroid affects metabolism, which for a diabetic means it will also affect how the body uses insulin. My sugar levels are erratic and I am literally living life one meal at a time as I don't know what my body is going to do next. But today just sucked. And I mean sucked.
I woke at 5.45am after having around 2 hour's sleep, and most of that was drenched in a cold sweat. As if waking up at that awful time wasn't bad enough, I was hypo... oh and it was Monday! After the obligatory glass of Lucozade and Weetabix, I dragged myself off into the shower hoping it would give me the pick me up I needed. The pick me up never came. Most of you reading this might wonder why I didn't just crawl back into bed, but I'm in a relatively new job and the last thing I want is a bad attendance record. So I sat infront of the mirror, ready to continue with the morning routine, and barely recognised the person looking back at me. In the space of two weeks I've aged ten years. My face is swollen, my body is bloated and my energy levels are close to zero. Although I'm training I've put on weight and I'm feeling low most of the time. But I did what a lot of women in the world do and put on my make up, straightened my hair and more or less crawled into work.
I'll be honest, I didn't last long at at work. Numbers looked like letters, letters looked like symbols and a task that would normally take an hour, took all morning. Luckily I have an understanding boss who had no problem in me going home. I packed up my desk and did what every little girl does when she's poorly... called her mum. Lunch was waiting for me, as was my favourite blanket on the sofa. And that's where I've spent the afternoon. I have my follow up appointment on Thursday with my consultant where hopefully I'll get started on Thyroxine and begin to feel more human. Until then I think bed and the sofa is best place for me, not least so I don't scare the kids with my hideously bloated face.
K x
I found out in January 2012 I had an overactive thyroid. More specifically I had what was called Graves Disease. Not the best name for an illness, granted, but it was named after the man who founded it, rather than it's prognosis (thank God). I'd been suffering with what I thought were hypo symptoms for a few weeks - hot flushes, palpitations, hand tremors, as well as an anxious feeling and weight loss. A routine blood pressure check with the practice nurse showed an increased heartbeat. I mentioned my pulse had been high at my last Diabetes appointment and after a short chat she suggested I have a blood test to check my thyroid. Sure enough, the tests came back showing it was overactive - basically it was producing too much of the hormone thyroxine which was why I'd been having all the symptoms I've just mentioned.
What I learned in the next couple of days about the the thyroid is quite remarkable. Now I am no doctor so my explanations are in simple terms for all to understand. It's a small butterfly shaped gland that sits neatly in your neck and produces hormones, one of them being thyroxine, and it does so much you wouldn't actually believe it. It's responsible for everything from regulating your heartrate to the way your hair and nails grow. If you produce too much thyroxine then things in your body speed up - metabolism, heartrate, appetite etc - and this is what had happened to me. The diagnosis of Grave's Disease came about as I am a text book case - a woman in her thirties with an underlying auto immune illness. Normally the symptoms can be treated with beta blockers which will take away the tremours and fluttering heart, but as those symptoms are also the symptoms of a hypo, it was decided that it would be too dangerous for me to take them. If I went hypo during the night and had no symptoms then I might not wake up. So my course of medication was a tablet to stop the thyroid from producing thyroxine altogether, and eventually take it into an underactive state, in order for me to have a type of treatment called Radioiodine.
Now this treatment isn't as bad as it may sound, infact it's been around for quite a number of years. This treatment stops the thyroid from producing too much thyroxine and involves taking a small pill containing radioactive iodine.... and, well that's it! You're radioactive for around two weeks, so there's to be no contact with babies, or pregnant women, and no sharing a bed with a partner. There are a few other things to avoid but they are minor. After the two weeks, normal service can be resumed. As for the side effects, well this is why I am sat here now writing this.
At first I felt nothing, maybe just a dry throat. But the purpose of the radioiodine is to ultimately take the thyroid into an underactive state so that a tablet can be taken every day for life, to replace the missing hormone. I am now in that underactive state and struggling. I'm not yet taking that tablet to replace the missing thyroxine so everyday tasks have become mammoth. I mentioned earier that the thyroid affects metabolism, which for a diabetic means it will also affect how the body uses insulin. My sugar levels are erratic and I am literally living life one meal at a time as I don't know what my body is going to do next. But today just sucked. And I mean sucked.
I woke at 5.45am after having around 2 hour's sleep, and most of that was drenched in a cold sweat. As if waking up at that awful time wasn't bad enough, I was hypo... oh and it was Monday! After the obligatory glass of Lucozade and Weetabix, I dragged myself off into the shower hoping it would give me the pick me up I needed. The pick me up never came. Most of you reading this might wonder why I didn't just crawl back into bed, but I'm in a relatively new job and the last thing I want is a bad attendance record. So I sat infront of the mirror, ready to continue with the morning routine, and barely recognised the person looking back at me. In the space of two weeks I've aged ten years. My face is swollen, my body is bloated and my energy levels are close to zero. Although I'm training I've put on weight and I'm feeling low most of the time. But I did what a lot of women in the world do and put on my make up, straightened my hair and more or less crawled into work.
I'll be honest, I didn't last long at at work. Numbers looked like letters, letters looked like symbols and a task that would normally take an hour, took all morning. Luckily I have an understanding boss who had no problem in me going home. I packed up my desk and did what every little girl does when she's poorly... called her mum. Lunch was waiting for me, as was my favourite blanket on the sofa. And that's where I've spent the afternoon. I have my follow up appointment on Thursday with my consultant where hopefully I'll get started on Thyroxine and begin to feel more human. Until then I think bed and the sofa is best place for me, not least so I don't scare the kids with my hideously bloated face.
K x
Thursday, July 19, 2012
New Beginnings
So, here I sit on a Wednesday evening. A Wednesday evening just like any other. Only there is something about this Wednesday that has prompted me to write my very first blog. And I'm wondering where I start... at the beginning? Where is the beginning? I have two beginnings. The first being the beginning of my very existence, more commonly known as the day I was born. And the second being the day I was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes, a day I have only just realised, 12 years later, that changed my life.
If I'm honest, I don't really remember a time when I didn't have Diabetes. Sure I remember growing up eating cakes and chocolate bars and all the other stuff that goes with being a kid, but I don't actually remember a time when I didn't inject. A time that didn't involve looking at a food item and wondering it's carbohydrate content, or how much insulin I'd need to inject be able to eat it. I do however remember the week I was told I had Type 1 Diabetes.
I feel at this point I should mention that I have an older brother who was diagnosed with Type 1 in adulthood, so most of the symptoms I was experiencing, he'd already experienced too. Anyway, I think the point I'm getting at is that deep down I knew I had Diabetes. My mother of course tried to convince me I was a drama queen (something I will not deny), and kept telling me I just wanted something wrong with me. But I couldn't ignore all these symptoms, so I made the appointment with my GP and a couple of days later I went in to see him. I told him my concerns and in return he gave me a small urine sample pot and told me to go pee in it. I swiftly returned, handed him the sample where he dipped a stick into it and turned to face me and said "without a shadow of a doubt you have Diabetes, the only thing we need to find out now is what type". The doctor asked how I felt and I told him I felt fine, which I did, mainly because I now had a reason for feeling so poorly. But, being the drama queen that I am, I was also looking forward to going home and telling my mam "I told you there was something wrong with me".
I was sent for blood tests the following day and then a couple of days after that a nurse called me and told me she wanted to see me at the hospital as soon as possible. It was at this point that things became very real. I was sat in a little room in the hospital, just me and my mother, when the specialist diabetic nurse walked in, arms full of all sorts of paraphernalia. I'll never forget her words "I'm sure you can work out from all these pens and needles here, you have Type 1 Diabetes". And there it was, the day that changed my life forever. The day my life began all over again.... age 24 and Type 1 Diabetic.
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